I think when domestic abuse happens, it is when parents or people in a relationship fail to communicate the right way. When they don’t communicate the right way, they start communicating the wrong way with yelling, screaming and physicality. They are trying to send the message with their hands instead of their head.
There are a lot of things that go into domestic abuse, just like with drinking and drugs. There are a lot of things that someone wants to say, so how come they couldn’t say them? So with domestic abuse there is a lot of miscommunication with the people involved, and the problem goes back to the feeling of why do they feel they can’t communicate it in the right way. Are they afraid and why are they not able to talk about why they are afraid.
A lot of clients will come in here and say “the wife won’t talk to me.” I will say “did you ask her why she won’t talk to you? What are you doing so that she is afraid to talk to you? What you are doing to make her feel uncomfortable?”
Because domestic abuse comes from a lack of communication, then you stem emotions, drinking, drugs, failures, all those in there to make a combustible situation. I see many women expressing their fears mentally, and men expressing their fears physically. And all that stems from a lack of communication, or lacking the skills to communicate.